Color me Summer

Most of us have so many responsibilities in life - work, home, kids, parents, pets - that we often forget to take care of the person that matters the most, ourselves. Taking care of you is your most important job and should be your first priority.  If you are a working mother, business owner, spouse, parent, or pet caretaker, everyone needs to take care of themselves first.  

Yesterday I was honored to go through a color analysis session with my daughter. Bridget lives in Dallas Texas and for the first time since the pandemic, my husband and I traveled to Dallas to visit her and her husband.  Bridget was introduced to color analysis about a year and a half ago when she and her sister in law went through a session and discovered their true colors.  She was immediately hooked on the process and loves using her color palette to choose clothing, makeup, and presenting her best self to the world. Bridget is a professional Opera singer and has many opportunities to use color to enhance her presentation during auditions and performances. 

The color theory is relatively simple - “Human coloration is diverse, beautiful, and affected by our undertones (color of our blood), and our natural skin pigmentation.”  “The goalof a Personal Color Analysis is to identify your natural color tone and to accurately place it into one of the scientifically organized 12 seasonal tones.”, says Rebecca Reid of Colorpolitan.   If we wear the colors that compete with our natural skin hues, we look, dull, sad, or invisible.  My skin has some yellow tones that were exaggerated when I was put in very bright colors, and I have always loved very bright colors.  Who knew that I was doing myself a disservice? Taking some time to visit with my daughter and learn something remarkable in the process was truly an exercise in honoring my authentic self.  

Taking care of and honoring yourself in any way, especially during this pandemic, is critical to your mental health and success. Self care can look like anything that pleases or relaxes you.  Whether you choose color analysis, exercise, healthy eating, reading, napping, or simply walking in nature.Anything to slow your mind and get to know yourself better will allow you to create space for better thoughts which will eliminate much of your stress.  

Reminding yourself to put you first will expand your ability to care for others.  Getting rest and energy on purpose before you extend care to others, increases your capacity for caring, understanding, and giving.  Your attitude will improve, you will expand your capacity for work, and you will allow yourself to set goals that never felt possible before.  Schedule your down time first and enter it into your calendar.  If you do that consistently each week you will be ready to step into the best version of yourself.  Filling your cup first gives you the ability to pour more out for others. 

Getting my color analysis done and learning that I am a “True Summer” was super fun and fascinating. Thank you Bridget and Rebecca for providing this amazing experience.

Schedule something fun and different this week to take care of you.  You will be better for it.

If you want to learn more about color analysis visit Rebecca’s website:  www.colorpolitan.com.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“Love yourself first, and everything else falls in line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” - Lucille Ball

Pandemic Fatigue

This week I was on vacation from the veterinary hospital.  Vacation from my day job in today’s world does not mean joyous trips to Disney or Florida beaches.  It means the same things that I have been doing for months — minus the driving to the veterinary hospital.  I ride my bike, write blogs, visit family over zoom, coach my clients, record my podcast, and pass time cleaning out closets. I have been doing the same thing for months and I am feeling a bit fatigued by it all.  My brain wants to make plans for travel, attend gatherings, and socialize, but there is no clear path to normalcy during a pandemic. 

Compassion fatigue is familiar to veterinarians — feeling tired and overwhelmed by the constant emotion of empathy that we provide to our clients.  Changes created by Covid-19 have made it even more difficult to create a positive narrative for our work and home life.  We feel feelings of loss for our previous lifestyle. Practicing medicine “curbside” has created new challenges and added to our work fatigue.

So as the days, weeks, and months go by how do we keep from losing ourselves to pandemic fatigue?  

Don’t make any big life changing decisions.  Just because you are feeling fatigued and overwhelmed now, does not mean that you will not love your job again.  Most of us started in veterinary medicine because we love to help people and animals. Now we are missing half of that equation. Remember that the people are still out there in the parking lot.  They need you just as much as they did before and you can be there for them. 

Set some boundaries. At most hospitals now the case loads are skyrocketing.  More people staying home, adopting pets, and being more observant.  That causes them to visit us more often.  Without more bodies in our clinics we are unable to see every case.  Setting a boundary around your time is something you need to do to keep yourself healthy and whole.  Try to remember that it is not your responsibility to see every pet.  Create a boundary for yourself and only see what you can reasonably do in a day.  Take care of yourself first and you will be better equipped to help again tomorrow. 

Cut yourself some slack.  We all have a tendency to think negatively and beat ourselves up for every little thing.  You have the ability to have a bad day, feel a bit sorry for yourself then, move on to better thoughts. Perfectionism hurts you by keeping you in the mindset that someone else can do better or is inherently better.   That kind of thinking is detrimental to your success.  The truth is that there is no perfect answer or outcome.   Allow yourself to see you as perfectly suited for each situation in your life. You are always worthy. 

Going through this pandemic is emotionally and physically exhausting, but if we stay focused on the positive and accept the negative we will fight off the temptation give in to pandemic fatigue.  

Dr. Julie Cappel

Join Me on the Podcast!
The Veterinary Life Coach Podcast

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-veterinary-life-coach-podcast-with-dr-julie-cappel/id1451549730

Are you financially prepared?

This Sunday morning as I was spending -- or more accurately, wasting -- a little time scrolling through my Facebook groups when I ran across a post from a veterinarian that was struggling with finances.  My first thought was, “of course veterinarians struggle; we don’t make much.”  My second thought was, “it does not have to be this way.” 

She was of retirement age and had worked as a veterinarian for over 35 years.  She had worked hard and long hours from the sound of it, but she was lamenting about the fact that she had no money saved and could not retire.  She was facing a surgery that would take her out of her practice for 3-6 months and she didn’t know how she would keep her business afloat while she was out of work.  How could she keep her one doctor practice going without the doctor?

Reading this post brought up thoughts of sadness and anger that this veterinarian had planned so poorly for her future. She cannot even take time out to care for herself let alone actually retire.  This women’s story made me want to scream, jump up and down, and warn every young person in our profession to walk a different path and make better decisions than some of your elders made. How do you get to the age of 68 and not have any money set aside for your future? 

I know what you are going to say: student loan debt, credit cards, divorce, kids, lack of health insurance, or medical bills that have built up over the years.  All things that happen to us, but if we are thoughtful with our money and work very hard, don’t have to take us down.

How do we do better?

No matter how much money you bring in, live on less.  Set yourself up a budget and follow it.  It sounds like the common sense that our parents and grandparents preached to us, but so many of us don’t follow their advice.  We blindly spend money that we do not have, using credit cards and taking out loans, so that we can have everything that we want NOW.  It is a little like Veruca Salt, the girl in Willie Wonka, “I want it now!”  No delayed gratification for us, we deserve to have everything that we want, regardless of our financial situation.  We are too impatient to wait and to save for anything.  This is precisely what gets us into trouble.  We don’t really need the new iPhone or tablet.  We don’t need Starbucks or restaurant food – except Taco Bell – we all need Taco Bell.  When your spending is planned ahead of time, your money will be more available for savings and retirement investing.

Pay off those student loans now.  Government sponsored forgiveness program are like handcuffs to your life.  Who wants to watch student loans loom over them for 20 years?  Get those suckers paid off as fast as you possibly can.  I was listening to Dave Ramsey’s podcast a few months ago and a young couple – they were both veterinarians – had come out of school with over $500,000 in debt between the two of them.  They decided that they were going to focus on their debt and get it paid off as soon as possible so they could live their lives without student loan debt.  They focused their attention on the debt, worked full time and weekends at emergency clinics, lived on a budget, drove beater cars, and paid off their debt in less than 5 years.  That’s right – two veterinarians, student loan free before they were 32 years old!  Listening to that couples’ story made me realize that veterinarians are not special when it comes to student loan debt.  You can overcome your debt in a short amount of time if you choose to focus in on it.

Contribute to your 401K or Simple IRA at your job. Every paycheck!  Please take advantage of your work retirement plan.  The younger you start, the more money you will have when you reach retirement.  You will think that is does not matter or that you cannot afford to contribute, but you will never miss the $25, $50 or $100 dollars that you contribute every 2 weeks.  Those small amounts will grow into hundreds of thousands of dollars in 20-30 years if it is invested in a good growth stock mutual fund.  You will never be sorry that you saved money for your future.  Many of the retirement plans offer employer matching as well, and that is just free money!  Don’t say no to free money!  Ever!

While I am using this women’s plight to make a point, I have tremendous sympathy for anyone that finds themselves in this situation.  Many of her peers have volunteered to help in her time of need, because that’s what generous veterinarians do. I want us to learn from her story and prevent others from finding themselves in her situation.  Money doesn’t buy happiness but having some control over it can buy you stability for your future.  

Dr. Julie Cappel

Do not save what is left after spending but spend what is left after saving. – Warren Buffett

“A simple fact that is hard to learn is that the time to save money is when you have some.”  - Joe Moore

Join me on The Veterinary Life Coach Podcast, where we talk about learning to change your life. Going from stress and burnout, to a life filled with balance and joy!

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-veterinary-life-coach-podcast-with-dr-julie-cappel/id1451549730

Getting Unstuck

Today, I was “coached” by my husband.  Yep - I was complaining about feeling stuck in the cold wet Michigan weather with a huge pile of things to do, and he turned my “coach” words back on me.   He said, “Why are you choosing to think about it in that way?”  then, “I was outside yesterday working, and I was thinking how beautiful the plants and trees looked with some rain on the leaves and the changing colors.”  Thanks Scott; those are beautiful thoughts!  Thank you for pulling me out of my pity party and showing me how my mind is working against me.    That negative “Chihuahua brain” of mine is always trying to bring me down.  

Why is it that we often feel stuck in the negative?  Why can’t we be more optimistic and take action towards what we really want? 

We look at our feelings about our job, our relationships, our weight, or our money and we feel like they are not under our control.  We feel at the mercy of the things that happen “to us” in the world.  The truth is that we cannot control any of the things.  Not the weather, not our past, even the things that others say to us or about us -   none of this is anything that we can control.

The only thing that is totally in our control is the way we think about all of the things that happen.  We are in control of our thoughts, and we are in control of our actions.  This is great news, because we all have power to get ourselves unstuck.

We don’t always want to take responsibility for our thoughts, feelings and actions because it seems easier to hide within the victim narrative that our brain creates for us.  If feels safer than doing the hard work that it takes to create our better life.  We spin in confusion and think, “I don’t know how to do it.”

Getting unstuck requires some motivation to feel better.  Why is it that you want to change and what are some solid reasons that you need to change?  Your reasons will provide you with the motivation to do something – to take action.  Having a compelling reason to manage your mind and then funnel those thoughts into actions, is the first step to get moving forward.

When you take your first step towards getting unstuck, you will probably feel some negative emotion.  Your brain will resist and fear failing.  Understand that this is normal and is the way getting unstuck feels.  It is often terrifying, but negative emotion is the pathway to change.  If you can feel the negative feelings and persevere anyway, you will begin to break down the walls that are keeping you stuck.

When you feel stuck, like I was today, tell your husband.  No, I am kidding - unless your husband will school you like mine did. 

When you are feeling stuck in anything, first look at your thoughts about it.  Realize that your thinking is a choice, and in order to feel better you are going to have to work to think better.  Try to come up with a solid reason that you want to change to provide yourself with some motivation.  Once you have a reason to change, take one action towards the thing that you want to change.  Prepare for some negative feelings and perhaps a few failures.  Resolve to move through the negative feelings and continue to push towards your goal.

That is how you will begin to become unstuck.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“Being unstuck is not only about having momentum and moving along with minimum friction. It also has to include the ability to endure difficulties and even hard slogs” - Matt Perman