Sunday Steps to Love Monday.

Have you ever dreaded Sunday evening because you know that tomorrow, Monday, you will have to get back into your week? With all of its activities, thoughts of the coming week cause Sunday anxiety. I used to spend many of my Sunday evenings stressing about the coming week. I was pre-stressing, and while doing that, I was missing out on exactly why I worked so hard all week, my family and leisure time. 

Most of us experience pre-stress when thinking about the day ahead. Here are a few ways to keep the pre-stress from ruining your Sunday.

Start by understand your thoughts about Monday. Take a little time before Sunday evening to anticipate your pre-stress thoughts. Imagine you are getting towards the evening, and you know that you will begin to feel anxious. Why are you feeling that way? What are you thinking? I used to think that I didn't get enough done at home, or I would run through the list of things that might happen Monday at work. Those anxious thoughts are precisely why you are not enjoying your Sunday evenings. Once you realize your unnecessary thoughts, you will catch them when they occur and stop spinning.

Plan for an enjoyable Sunday evening by getting your Monday morning prep work out of the way Saturday or early Sunday. Prepare the clothes, meal plan, pack lunches, and get everything together for a successful week. Have your kids participate in making it a family activity. Some people are great at prepping for their week, but others could be more skilled. I remember panicking on Monday morning, looking for that permission slip due at school. You will feel less stress if you get all that done and laid out. Practice makes perfect, so start somewhere. Start with something small, like pre-packing your lunch for Monday, then move on to something more complicated. Do a little prep work, so Monday is more manageable and enjoyable. 

Schedule something relaxing or fun for Sunday evening. Do not allow your thoughts to keep you from enjoying what you plan. It may be something simple like a game or puzzle with the family but do not scroll through social media. That crap makes you feel more anxious. Go to bed a little early (talking to myself here - a night owl), so you can set your Monday alarm 30 minutes ahead. That way, you can enjoy your long morning and ease into the week. However, do not use this as an excuse to procrastinate your weekend prep work.

Spend a little time over the weekend to plan some fun, exciting, or important things for Monday. It may be as simple as planning a walk with your co-workers or accomplishing a task you missed last week. If you schedule a time to finish something early on Monday, you will feel more in control of the remainder of your week. Planning a fun activity will give you something to look forward to and combat negativity.

You can change your Sunday and love your Monday by changing your mind and habits. Do not shame yourself when you start to stress, but understand that it comes from your anxious thoughts about the future. Stay in your present, enjoy your family, and let Monday come - It will, anyway.

Let me know if you need help!

Dr. Julie Cappel

“This should be the spirit every Monday. Know that something good will always happen.” - Gabriel Garcí­a Márquez

The Problem with Perfection

Most veterinarians have perfectionist tendencies. Our profession encourages it because we need to adhere to high standards, but since perfection is impossible, our desire to be perfect may cause anxiety and lead to depression.

Clinical psychologist Simon Sherry and lecturer Martin M. Smith define perfectionism as “striving for flawlessness, a state which renders an individual sensitive to criticism and plagued by self-doubt when estimating their performance abilities.”

In their 2019 study, they found perfectionism has increased substantially since 1990. They suggest that this phenomenon may be fueled by everything from parents who are critical and controlling to boastful social media postings reflecting unrealistic images of other people living perfect lives.

How can we let go of perfectionism while still working to be the best we can be?

Remember that you are talented and unique; there is a difference between achievement and perfection. It took many years of hard work and dedication to get to where you are today. Remember that the clients appear in your exam room because they trust and respect you. They pay you for your education, discernment, and expert opinion, not perfection.

Realize that veterinarians, like all other humans, are not perfect. You can strive for excellence while knowing that the goal of perfection is impossible. You can accept imperfections or small failures as part of your learning process. Accepting that failure is part of the human experience may relieve some of the pressure you place on yourself.

Recognize your successes, focus on the positive, and celebrate your accomplishments. Keep a success journal. Read it every time you start to feel self-doubt in the face of imperfection. Hold on to the thank-you notes and cards your clients send you. Your clients know that you do everything in your power to help them, and they acknowledge it. Read a few of them the next time you feel anxiety or self-doubt creep in.

Set reasonable and achievable goals. Not to lower your pursuit of excellence but give yourself a break and reward yourself for your achievements. 

Confide in a mentor, coach, or therapist who understands why you are struggling. Seek help when you feel that the self-doubt is keeping you from being the best you can be. By understanding that everyone in this profession struggles with perfectionism, you will recognize that you are not alone and will be able to quickly accept your feelings when they arise.

Love yourself, warts and all.  

Dr. Julie Cappel

“The pursuit of perfection is frustrating and a waste of time because nothing is ever perfect. The pursuit of excellence is commendable and worthwhile. Therefore strive for excellence, not perfection.” - Alan Kulwicki.

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