Practice Daily Optimism - Choosing happiness in New York

What does it mean to practice optimism?  Some people seem to have it naturally while others choose it.  I think of myself as a naturally optimistic person but in the current world situation it can be difficult to keep my head on straight.

Last weekend I took my first plane trip since the beginning of Covid-19.  I traveled directly from Detroit to New York City where the virus cases seem to be declining.  The decision to make this trip really messed with my brain.  It was such a difficult decision to make, weighing the pros and cons of traveling during a pandemic.  Never before have I had so much anxiety about traveling.  Well, maybe in 2001, after 9/11 - I was very anxious after that.  

Why did I travel?  I really wanted to visit my son who I have not seen since February.  I wanted to see his new apartment, his place of work, and visit with him and his girlfriend.  I wanted to do all these things and still be as safe as possible and that was a real exercise in optimistic thinking.

Here is how I practiced daily optimism while traveling in a pandemic.

First, I chose to think optimistically.  When my brain told me that the plane would be full of germs and coughing people, I told my brain that the airline would be keeping things clean, distancing passengers, and filtering air. I decided on purpose that I would wear my best mask and keep myself as far away from everyone as possible.  I decided that I am a healthy person that has a great immune system and nothing to worry about.  I chose not to worry.

Second, I actively looked for all things positive.  The weather was beautiful, the airport was virtually empty, the people were polite, and New York was amazing.  I spent time with my son visiting, walking, and eating - too much eating  - we had a beautiful time.  The fact that all of our site-seeing time was spent walking around town and riding the ferry, allowed us to see all the beautiful sites of the city without the crowds.  I looked for all things positive and that is what I saw.

Third, I filled my life with supportive and optimistic people both before and after the trip.  Having people in your circle to listen to your concerns and help you to see things more optimistically is one way to stay in touch with your positive thoughts.  When you choose to keep a team of supportive people around you things will look better to you. Optimism will feel easier to accomplish. 

When you are feeling a bit pessimistic, remember that you have the power and ability to change the way that you think to become more optimistic.  Starting with small positive thoughts and then building on them will result in a positivity habit.  Our lives can never be safe and secure 100% of the time, and if we wait for total security and lack of risk, we will never reach our goals and truly live.  

Think things through and choose how you want to live, then practice daily optimism to help you take action. You may even decide to travel to New York.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“It’s not that optimism solves all of life’s problems; it is just that it can sometimes make the difference between coping and collapsing.” 

– Lucy MacDonald

Leading With Fun.

This week, at our hospital, we had our monthly team meeting.  We meet each month in the middle of the day to discuss client service, hospital events, hospital policies, and procedures.  The meetings are usually well attended by the team because we have free lunch, and everyone gets to sit down and relax for couple hours.   At some of the meetings I do team building exercises designed to bring the team closer together and have a little fun.

 

This week it was a photo scavenger hunt with two teams and two cell phone cameras.  We ran around the hospital performing silly tasks and taking photos to try to compete with the other team.  As you can see in the photos, a good time was had by all.

Part of being a good leader is ensuring that your team is allowed, and encouraged, to have fun.  Why do good leaders want a fun workplace?

When team members are having fun, they are less stressed. People that are stressed make more mistakes, take more sick days, and have poorer communication that those that are less stressed. Fun reduces stress.

When team members have fun, they are more engaged in the business.  Engaged employees provide better customer service for your clients and pay more attention to details.

Productivity is also increase when people are having fun.  It may seem like having fun does not lead to work, but the truth is that some fun or relaxation time refreshes us and allows us to feel energized, engaged, and motivated allowing people to get more done.

When work is fun, the business has lower turnover.  People that know that their employer has their back and are allowed to have fun are less likely to look for another job.

How can we create fun for our team?

Watch your employees and observe when they have a good attitude or are having fun.  When you notice, tell them that you love to see them happy and having fun at work.  Participate in the merriment if you can and reward them for their great attitude.

Model a positive outlook them.  When you are the leader you are expected to do better and act better.  Do you enjoy your work?  If it is not obvious that you do, you need to share your feelings more openly with your team. If you as the leader have fun at work, your team will join you.

Allow them to have fun.  It is difficult as a leader to see people that are on the time clock not working, however it is important to allow your team some time to play.  Give them a little space to chat, joke or eat together.  Yesterday I bought my team donuts from the bakery across the street and they all took a minute to eat a donut together.  It takes a few minutes away from their work, however once they eat, they are much happier to get back to work and serve the clients.

Create enjoyment in your workplace.  This is my favorite step when it comes to fun for my team.  I love to create games and funs things for us to do at work.  I have done scavenger hunts, shopping trips, movies, puzzles, auctions, and so many games.  Our current hospital game involves a Barbie doll dressed in a lab coat.  We hide Barbie around the hospital (think - elf on a shelf).  When a team member happens to find her, that team member must write a compliment about another team member and post it in the lunchroom, on the board “Barbie Says”.  Then the team member has to hide her again for the next person to find. 

The last time I saw Barbie she was in a winter coat made of cotton balls and bandage material (because it is winter here in Michigan and she was cold).  

Work and fun are not mutually exclusive.  We can create a more successful work environment by simply creating and allowing a little fun. 

Lead well and have some fun.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing.” Dale Carnegie

Join me on The Veterinary Life Coach Podcast, where we talk about learning to change your life. Going from stress and burnout, to a life filled with balance and joy!

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-veterinary-life-coach-podcast-with-dr-julie-cappel/id1451549730

5 Ways to Get Over Your Pity Party.

We all have those moments in life where it feels as if we are hit hard and knocked down by our circumstance.   We are cruising along doing pretty well for ourselves and all at once, something happens that takes us down and stops our forward momentum.   We hit a wall in our business, experience a health issue, or have a personal relationship failure.  Something happens that causes us to slide into negative thinking and feeling. 

What can we do to get ourselves out of this negative life space and avoid the pity party?

Live in the truth for a short time.  Give yourself a bit of time to feel bad or mourn your loss.  When you feel let down by someone, or something that didn’t happen for you, it is OK to acknowledge those bad feelings and really feel them.  If you avoid the bad feelings and try to push them away, they will become more powerful than they actually are. Give yourself a short time to feel negative emotion about the lost dreams.  Once you have felt the negative feelings all the way through, it will be easier to let go of them and move on.

Avoid a victim mentality.  Feeling like a victim for example, when a client yells at you for something beyond your control, destroys your self-confidence and removes your sense of empowerment over the circumstance. The more you dwell in disappointment and worry about that client’s feelings, the more difficult it will be to get into problem solving mode and overcome the difficulty.  Self-pity or victimhood can be destructive if you choose to dwell there. 

Get a little perspective.  We often feel sad or disappointed about something that we will not really remember in a month or so.  Think about the big picture.  Let your mind go to a place several months in the future and think about whether this disappointment will be relevant then.  Are there other more important things that you can think about now to move on?  Realizing that many of the things we experience in life will not be important months or years in the future, will help you to gain perspective about the issue at hand.

Remember that success does not always equal happiness.  Successes often feel great in the moment, but that happiness is not sustained over the long term.  Studies of lottery winners show that they are no happier one year after their lottery win than they were before the money.  Life has a tendency to even out with levels of negative and positive emotion.  There are times when a good failure is more important to your long-term success than an instant win.  You can choose to be happy with each moment regardless of the circumstance.

Identify your next opportunity. Focusing on the lessons that a failure brings will allow you to envision future successes. Knowing that each day offers renewed opportunity to try again will allow your brain to get beyond the self-pity and move on to future possibility. Focusing on your next move will help you let go of the current problem and use the lessons learned to propel you forward. 

When things don’t work out the way you originally planned, realize that nothing has gone terribly wrong.   Failure and disappointment are difficult for all of us to deal with, but you can face it with dignity and grace if you follow these five steps.  Treat yourself with compassion and see what you can learn from the situation.  Try not to judge yourself so you do not get stuck in a downward spiral of the prolonged pity party.  Let it go and move on.

Dr. Julie Cappel

Join me on the Podcast!

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-veterinary-life-coach-podcast-with-dr-julie-cappel/id1451549730

“It's not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.” - Epictetus

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do.” ― H. Jackson Brown Jr.