As I work to research
stress and anxiety in our profession and talk to veterinarians about their
daily struggles, it becomes clear to me that most of our stress comes from our expectations
about, and interactions with our clients.
I have been doing this job for a long time and it seems that client
interactions have become more and more tense for us. We stress about correct diagnosis, treatment
success, and surgery skill, but the things that seem to hit us the hardest are
the things our clients think about us, say to us, and how they treat us on
social media.
As I have been working
through these thoughts, it occurred to me that there are three main reasons
that we mentally struggle with our clients.
Three assumptions that we make about them, that if we could think
differently, we could do a better job at managing our stress.
Our first mistake when
dealing with clients is that we assume that they know more than they know. Sure, they often “Dr. Google” their pet’s
symptoms and sometimes they are in the ballpark, but they really don’t have
medical knowledge to discern whether their research makes practical sense, or understand
diagnostic tests will be needed to confirm that Dr. Google diagnosis. When I ask them questions about diet, symptoms,
length of illness, or past medical history, I often get answers that do not add
up. For example, I see a mammary mass on
a dog that is encompassing one quarter of the abdomen and the client tells me
that it just popped up in the past few weeks.
I know that this cannot be true.
I know that this really means that the client is busy with everyday life,
so they did not see anything wrong until it was seriously wrong. If I choose to be upset by this fact, I will
cause myself undo stress. If I accept
that this is where we are, and I can do my very best to make proper treatment
recommendations from this place in time, I can proceed without taking on any
anxiety about it.
The second mistake that we
make when dealing with clients is that we assume that they want the very best and
will do the very best for their pet. We
think we know “best”, but clients get to decide what is best for their pet and
their situation. Best is a matter of
opinion. We may not always agree with
the choices that our clients make when it comes to their pets, but our job is
to give them the options that we have been trained to give. We need to allow them to make the choices for
their pet and their family. It is not up
to us to judge their decisions. We are
there to support them in whatever decision that they make, without taking on
the emotion. We should assume that they
will do what they believe is best for their pet. We can love them through any “best” decision.
The third mistake that we
make is that we assume that clients know how difficult our job can be. We know that we are not God and cannot save every
life. We understand our limitations. We
assume that clients realize this as well.
We think that they know we are doing our very best to help them in every
situation. They may actually think that we
make a lot of money and are living richly off of the dollars that they spend in
our hospitals. They may think us
uncaring when we give them a treatment plan that they cannot afford. In reality, we are caring individuals that
are doing a very difficult job and taking this all home with us. We are causing ourselves undo stress and anxiety
over every one of their pets’ problems. They do not see our pain. Continuing to communicate with the public
about how difficult some of our days can be is the first step in bridging this
gap.
So, if you are a veterinary
client reading this, or a working veterinarian, realize that we all care about the same thing: loving and healing pets. Clients, you need veterinarians to be healthy
and whole to help you. Veterinarians, you need your clients to continue the
valuable work that you are passionate about. We have a difficult job as veterinarians, but
pet owners have a difficult job as well.
We are on the same team and we should treat each other with respect, compassion
and understanding.
Being open to each other
makes us better humans.
Dr. Julie Cappel
If having a soul means
being able to feel love and loyalty and gratitude, then animals are better off
than a lot of humans.
—
James Herriot
Truly caring people know
they have to take care of themselves first.
- Marty Rubin
- Marty Rubin
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