My Bold Friend

This week I had the distinct privilege to record a podcast with a bright, outspoken, and accomplished veterinarian. Dr. Jessica Moore-Jones is one of those people who I admire for her bold spirit and unapologetic personality. I met her virtually several months ago, and I have been a big fan of her ever since. She lives and works in Western Australia, where she runs her business, Unleashed Coaching and Consulting. She has been a veterinarian, shelter manager, and small business owner for several years and coaches veterinary groups teaching them resilience and success skills. She has a firm grasp of her opinions and is one of those who can speak her mind without regard for what others think. I aspire to be bolder like her. 

The dictionary defines bold as "Showing an ability to take risks: confident and courageous." I have always admired people who are brave and unafraid to be themselves. They know themselves and remain confident in their actions. I do have my bold moments, for sure, but It has taken me many years to truly embrace being bold about so many things in my life.  

Yesterday I had a bold moment in which I took a client to task about the way they were caring for their pet. They had allowed their severely obese dog to suffer from a serious infection for months. It was a sad case, and I pulled out my boldest self to tell the client what they needed to do to properly remedy the situation and care for their sweet dog. I am generally more fearless when advocating for another person or a pet than I am about protecting myself. 

How can I learn from Dr. Jessica's bold spirit and become bolder?  

I need to know my values and stay strong in my priorities. You cannot make solid and quick decisions if you are not strong in your values. Bold people are those that know what they want and stay focused on the important things. If I can remember to remain grounded in my morals and values, I can make solid decisions and take bold actions about my future.

Bold leaders have a strong sense of self-awareness. They are bold but not careless. They carefully study themselves to understand their strengths and weaknesses. They are not afraid to do the work that it takes to build on their strengths and let others cover for their shortcomings. They are not self-absorbed but self-aware. Bold leaders are the ones that can hire people that are smarter and faster than themselves to get the job done. They put their egos aside to better the team. I aspire to be a bold leader. 

Bold people speak up for themselves and are not worried about what others think of them. They are not loud or rude, but they speak their mind when it is important to do so. They speak up and also take action when action is needed. Boldness allows us to make confident decisions and not fear failure. 

To be bold, I need to remember to speak my mind, make firm decisions, and set boundaries to protect my time and values. So, I will take an example from Dr. Jessica and speak my mind with confidence.  I hope you do the same. 

Dr. Julie Cappel

"Be bold, be brave enough to be your true self." Queen Latifah

"It's only by being bold that you get anywhere." -- Richard Branson

Listen to Dr. Jessica Moore-Jones and me on The Veterinary Life Coach Podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.

  

Spring Cleaning

I love a clean house, but I dislike cleaning house. It is a problem, I know, but this week I watched a couple of episodes of "Hoarders," and now I am supremely motivated to clean up my home and my mind.

If you have never watched an episode of this show, let me tell you why I find it fascinating. The extreme hoarders that they feature collect things to suppress and avoid their negative emotions. Most of them have experienced significant tragedy in their life, and their way of coping is to surround themselves with things. Most live with overwhelming hoards of possessions, garbage, insects, and even rat infestations. They work with therapists to help them deal with their emotions so they can, in turn, deal with their hoard.

This show interests me because I see the relationship between cleaning my home and working on my mind. I am not a hoarder, but I do sometimes avoid tedious tasks like washing windows.  My brain deserves the same treatment as my home when it comes to spring cleaning. With the pandemic finally coming to an end, I am ready for a clean-up of my house (especially the windows), my goals, and my brain.

 

Sometimes working on your mind feels impossible. There are so many things going on up there. It is often easier to ignore the thoughts and focus on anything fun. Eating, drinking, and Instagram feel so much better than taking on the overwhelming task of working on yourself. But as we have seen with our hoarding friends, ignoring your mind work leads to brain clutter. 

How do I coach myself to work on my brain?

Rekindle my goals. Spring is a great time to double down on those New Years' resolutions that I made in January. It is time to check in with myself and critically look at how I spend my time and energy. (I will not continue expending energy watching Hoarders - for a start.) If I refocus on my goals or resolutions, I will clean up my thinking about my accomplishments and take better steps towards creating my best work.

Work on my stories. We all have these stories that we keep in our minds about ourselves. They are most often negative things that we picked up somewhere in our younger days that haunt us in the present. I have a few of these. One of my main "self stories" is that I am unfocused and easily distracted. If I indulge in this story and believe it to be accurate, it keeps me from focusing and creating for myself. Meditate on your life, find a story that feels true for you, then work to let it go. Believing negative things about yourself does not pay. The sooner you work on cleaning up these brain stories, the sooner you can get moving in your life. 

Our homes and our brains need cleaning and care. My dirty windows are a direct reflection of my cluttered brain. So, let's use springtime as a marker for self-reflection and self-improvement.

If you need help with your brain cleaning, I am here for you. Likewise, if you want to help me clean my house — or wash my windows — I am open to that also.

Dr. Julie Cappel

Work with me!  https://www.juliecappel.com/coaching

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You never know

Many mornings, when my alarm goes off, my first thought is, “Oh, no! I don’t want to go to work today.” I snooze my alarm, once or sometimes twice, but never three times because my dogs will not let me sleep that long. I slog to the kitchen, let the dogs out, make their food, and start the coffee. 

I go through my morning routine, get ready for work, get in the car, and drive. No one is forcing me. I am free to stay in bed. Free to change careers. Free to quit.

I choose to go. 

My workdays are emotionally and physically exhausting. Challenging days when clients yell at me because I cannot perform miracles. Frustrating days when they berate my team because we cannot make time for them. Somber days when clients thank me through their tears for helping them say goodbye to a dear friend. Surprising days when I unexpectedly pull a moribund pet back to life from the brink of death. Joyful days when that wiggly little buff cocker spaniel puppy kisses me while piddling with pure excitement at meeting me for the first time.  

Why do I work? Because I choose to experience the emotional rollercoaster that is veterinary medicine. I prefer to see it as challenging and maybe even a little fun.

It seems to be automatic and expected that we complain about our work, but complaining about our day before it begins sets us up for failure. If we instead choose to see our day as a rich experience with a full range of human emotion, we may feel more excited about our work. Where else can you cry with a family one minute and cuddle a happy puppy in the next? Maybe we can see it like Forrest Gump’s box of chocolates, “You never know what you are going to get.”

When I dive deep and start to question myself, it is apparent that I love what I do. Why else would I work at it every day for the past 30 plus years?  Why would I chose to take on a second career as a life coach for veterinarians if I did not love my veterinary life? I want to share that love with others in our profession.  I find a unique fulfillment in my ability to help pets, help people, and add value to the world.  

As much as I want you to think positively about your chosen career, I understand that this profession is no joke. My morning brain reminds me that it is hard.  It can be heartbreaking and fulfilling at the same time. Try to remember that there is value in the good and the bad experiences. Allowing yourself to feel all of the emotion that it brings will help you appreciate the many rewards. 

You can choose to go to work each day with negativity, or you can choose an attitude of expectation and possibility.

When tensions are high during a busy veterinary day, remember to stay humble, calm and look for the fun. You never know what you will get.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“The only way to do great work is to love what you do.” —Steve Jobs

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How do I want to show up?

If the past year has taught us anything, it is how quickly life can change. The veterinary industry is working through many challenges, including increased demand and a decreased workforce.  My hospital is no exception. Since the end of last summer, we have been working with a skeleton crew when several of our team members left to either stay home with their children or take other positions. Those of us still working have been growing weary under the weight of our increased workload.  

When work increases and team capacity decreases, we may begin thinking of ourselves as victims. I experienced an episode of this on Thursday.  I was the only scheduled doctor with surgeries and also a spattering of client appointments. As I slogged through the pile of records that I had leftover from earlier in the week, attended to my surgeries, and answered the myriad of questions that my team brought to me, I started to feel overwhelmed. I am usually excited by a good challenge, but my brain goes into victim mode when I start to feel overwhelmed with stress. As I begin to feel like a victim, I become short with my team and reclusive. I want to crawl into a hole to protect myself from one more question. I get snappy and impatient. Finally, my brain tells me that it is all too much, and I start to indulge in my victim story. I begin to think, “Why do I have to do everything? Maybe I should just quit. Why won’t they leave me alone?” 

I have coached others and had coaching on this exact subject, but my brain still gets away from me sometimes. So, when I find myself thinking that I am a victim of my circumstances, I have to ask myself one key question to help bring myself out of my victim thinking.

How do you want to show up today?

My attitude is my responsibility and requires constant work on self-improvement. I have the power to change the way that I choose to think about everything. Self-development is the key to controlling ourselves when we start to feel overwhelmed and victimized. Your subconscious mind will direct you if you ignore training it to behave. I mean that if we don’t practice positive thinking, our brains will not learn to change from negativity to positivity.  

Decide who you want to be, and practice being that person each day—keeping in mind that we all need to experience failure to learn lessons. If you strive to take one small step towards your ideal self daily and visualize the person want to be, you can snap out of your thinking as soon as you realize that you are in victim mode.

Have some “power thoughts” at your disposal to use in times of extreme stress. For example, thinking things like, “You got this,” “All things will pass,” “You are a rock star,” or anything that helps you to drop the victim statements. Taking control of your brain requires you to teach it new and powerful thoughts. It may feel strange when you start to use these thoughts — they will feel inauthentic and cliche, but once your brain starts to believe them, it will be easier to get out of “poor me” and into solution mode. 

When you feel like a victim, remember to work to change your thinking and be the person you want to be.

Dr. Julie Cappel

"There’s nothing more daring than showing up, putting ourselves out there, and letting ourselves be seen.” - Brené Brown

Client Fatigue/Exhaustion

Fatigue feels mental. Exhaustion feels physical.  The veterinary profession is experiencing both.

Yesterday, as I was working at my busy veterinary hospital, I found myself feeling resentful about the way clients are treating myself and my team.  I am normally a pretty positive person, but it has become more and more challenging to look at some client behavior in a positive light.  Now don’t get me wrong, most of our clients are kind, patient, and appreciative, but the few bad applies are getting worse.  Social media has given them the power to retaliate, often anonymously, when they are unhappy.

Some show up late with no apology and then demand immediate service.  They do not wish to wait or reschedule.  Some make a wellness appointment, bring a list of multiple ailments that they want addressed, and then berate the technicians with, “Why is this taking so long? I have to take my son to soccer practice!”  I even have some clients try to threaten me with euthanasia — of their pet, not me  — if we cannot squeeze them in to keep them from having to consult an emergency hospital. 

We often struggle with high levels of stress and compassion fatigue in our profession, but that fatigue is starting to turn into full out physical exhaustion for many working in this industry.  Like many businesses in the United States, the veterinary industry is working shorthanded.  A recent US poll showed that 42% of small businesses report that they are struggling to fill job openings and are working with a diminished team.  Couple that with the fact that there is a drastic rise in demand for veterinary services and we are experiencing industry wide exhaustion.

Is there a way to keep the angry client demand from ruining us for the grateful clients?  Is there a way to keep from feeling overwhelmed, fatigued, and exhausted?

We need to recognize that clients control their behavior, we do not.  I do not always understand what is happening for them, but I know that their behavior is dictated by their feelings.  They may have stress in their home life or their experience in the pandemic.  Those negative feelings have now spilled over to create bad behavior that is directed at myself and my team. 

When clients are demanding or unreasonable, it usually comes from a place of pain. These folks are often the people that want the best for their pets.  Some are actual bullies, and if you give a bully an opening he will take it.  Do not let a bully know that they are intimidating you.  If you can calmly acknowledge their feelings and offer to help them, you will usually remain calm, strong, and in control.  They are misguided in thinking that rude demanding behavior will get them what they want.  You have the power to set boundaries in a kind firm manner.  Staying strong and unflappable is the only way to win over a bully, so push back a little and watch them back down.  If they don’t back down you can ask them to leave, but expect the negative review and prepare to ignore it.  Most bad reviews come from very unhappy people not anything that the business has done, and we all know it.

Set up some relief time for your team.  Working shorthanded can only be maintained for so long before people start to collapse mentally and physically.   Shorten your hospital hours, schedule more breaks into the day, and utilize your technology to communicate with clients.  Take some time off the clock — without phones ringing — even if for only 30 minutes.  Take a walk around the block with your team after work, or just step outside for a few minutes. Have a group lunch, build a puzzle, or play a game.  If you work in an area without emergency clinics, or you are the emergency clinic, find another clinic and try to cover for each other.  As a profession we need to come up with solutions between hospitals to share the burden, so team members can get a break.  

Just remember that you can only control your own behavior and care for your team during these trying times.  Our profession needs to work together to address client abuses and care for the mental health of ourselves and our teams.  We are the people that love animals, and we need to continue to love and care for ourselves so we can continue to do our important work.  The majority of the clients will appreciate your efforts to care for your team and yourself.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“Self-care is never a selfish act—it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others.”- Parker Palmer

“Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love.” - Brené Brown

Focused and unfinished

I struggle with focus.  At least, that is what my brain tells me.  I have a story in my brain that I am not a focused person. It is one of my main struggles and the thing that I work on most.   I have been coached on this story many times, but it is deeply ingrained in my brain.  That little chihuahua brain of mine loves this “unfocus” story. 

I am sure that you can relate to having some negative story in your brain.  We all tend to create a negative bias story related to things that happened in our past.  They often come from emotional memories or trauma that becomes part of our self-image.  

Much of my “unfocus” story comes from something that one of my teachers said to me when I was in Junior High School.  This teacher was a super intimidating figure to me. He was a big, bald-headed, very stern guy that was also a little mean, and I was a bit afraid of him, to be honest. The project he had assigned was something about the government, and I worked super hard on the paper.  I researched it, wrote it (to the best of my ability), and did artwork on the cover to go along with the project.  I turned it in feeling very accomplished and confident that I had done a fantastic job.   A few days later, I remember the teacher calling me up to his desk and telling me that he was giving me a B-minus on my paper. He was of the opinion that I could do better.  He told me that I was the type of person that was smart enough to get ahead, but I was not focused enough to ever be very successful. 

I remember this conversation distinctly because it made me question myself and gave me this lasting internal story that I was not, or never would be good enough or focused enough to be successful. I have worked around and worked on this story ever since.  

Almost all of us have a negative self-story in our brain that results from something someone said when we were children or young adults.  It often sticks with us for life.  Your work is to understand where that story came from and change the belief that you have about that story being true. 

Challenge your negative thinking.  Is this self-story accurate?  What are the facts of the story?  When you ask yourself these questions, you will quickly realize that much of your story is created by you.  The things that the teacher said were hurtful but not accurate. The facts were simply that I wrote the paper, and he said something unkind.  When I think of the story this way, I am able to dismantle the power that the words had over me. I focus and move on. 

What are the negative thoughts that I think about my story, and what makes this story positive?  In my case, the negative thought is,  I am unfocused.  When I feel unproductive in my life, these negative thoughts can reemerge.  The things that make this story positive for me is the kick in the pants that the teacher’s statement created for me.  I am more motivated in my life because that teacher decided to give me a smackdown.  Perhaps that was his evil plan all along.  Thanks teach!

The last mental challenge you need to make when faced with your negative story is to question why you continue to hang onto this story.  When I think about it, I know that the story is only there for my motivation.  I no longer believe that it is true; I know that it is part of my growth journey and an interesting step in my self-development.  

Challenge your negative belief stories and realize that many of them are overblown in your brain.  Beliefs are just thoughts that you think over and over again.  When you believe something negative about yourself, know that we are all works in progress and your job is to change your story.  Learn from it, focus, and move forward to a better you.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“There are so many people who will tell you that you can’t do this, but you have to make sure that your voice isn’t going to be one of them.” ― Pooja Agnihotri, 

“Reality is a projection of your thoughts or the things you habitually think about.” ― Stephen Richards

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Shopping is good for your soul.

Today I spent the day shopping with my son and his girlfriend.  We went to the mall to look around and have lunch inside a restaurant. A rare treat these days.  In fact, in the past two weeks, I have spent more time in shopping malls and restaurants with my family than I have during the entire previous year.  As the world is getting back to normal activities — post covid vaccinations —I have joined the land of the free-living and returned to one of our favorite American pastimes, mall shopping.  

I feel amazing when I shop. (At least for the first couple hours.)  I love looking around and seeing things that I may have never seen before. I also love people-watching.  I enjoy getting a Starbucks coffee and walking around looking for bargains and “cute” things.  I take it that other people enjoy shopping too, based on the number of people at the mall today.  There were lines of people, shopping and spending their money on everything from Lululemon to Lego.  

As I watched the people go by, I wondered whether shopping is actually good for us or are we simply distracting ourselves from life’s problems?  The little bit of research that I did when I got home says that both things are true.  Shopping is mentally and physically healthy for us when done in moderation.  

Some experts think that shopping can help with loneliness, boredom, and depression.  People that feel out of control in their lives can actually feel more in control when they make purchasing decisions.  The feelings of accomplishment that come with the discovery of a good bargain may overcome low self-esteem.  Shopping can bring family members closer as they work together to find something to buy.  The act of shopping together acts as an emotional bonding activity. 

A study published in the Journal of Psychology and Marketing, revealed that 62% of shoppers reported that they had purchased something to cheer themselves up, and another 28% had purchased something as a type of celebration.  We use shopping to help us prepare for important events such as weddings, graduations, or new babies.  The shopping that we do to prepare for life changes helps us to feel more in control of our future. 

Shopping can also be good for us physically.  I put a lot of miles on my feet in my trek around the malls these last couple of weeks.  An article in The Daily Telegraph newspaper reported that walking and carrying shopping bags burns off over 300 extra calories and that women walk an average of three miles for every two hours of shopping.  Shopping gets you up off of your butt and onto your feet for a prolonged period of time.  That is my kind of exercise!

The best thing about shopping is that it can be both relaxing and entertaining.  The physical activity, interesting people, social interaction, and visual variety is a bit like visiting a museum — without the need for much intellectual thought.   Losing yourself in a shopping excursion can help to clear your mind and clarify your objectives.  As long as you remember to check the overspending, shopping is good for your heart and soul.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“Whoever said that money can’t buy happiness simply didn’t know where to go shopping.”— Bo Derek

Family ties

Sunday is trivia day in my family.  Since the beginning of the Covid lockdowns we started a tradition of meeting every Sunday on a zoom call to visit, catch up, and play trivia.  Each week someone presents a series of questions to the others and we see which of us is the best at general trivia.  We have kept in touch this way for a year now from New Mexico, Texas, Florida, Michigan, and New York.  The tradition of getting together each week helped us all to navigate the changes that the lockdowns caused and helped us to feel more connected, despite our forced separation.

 

Family is an important part of a mentally healthy life. Family may not always be blood relatives, but often are friends and coworkers.  Any close relationship that you form with people in order to share your life, will keep you on track in times of adversity. Strong family relationships will help you grow, so nurturing those relationships will add to your ability to be successful in whatever you choose to do. 

How do we build strong relationships with the people in our lives? 

Practice acceptance and fondness.   Our relationship with other people is all about the way we think and feel about them.  Creating a strong relationship with someone simply requires you to think highly of them and accept them for who they are.  There is no specific behavior required on their part but the openness to receiving your acceptance.  Allowing another person to be themselves and loving them anyway is at the root of all strong relationships. Looking for the good in every interaction will allow you to let people be exactly who they are.

Make strong commitments to your family and friends.  If you do not commit to working on relationships, you will not allow them to grow. Committing to following through on plans  and promises will keep you honest, and build trust in your relationships.  Spending your time with family first, and setting boundaries around that commitment is a healthy way to keep those strong relationships.

Share in activities and communication.  Communication is required to resolve conflict and create acceptance of each person in a relationship. People always have different points of view so keep an open mind and just allow opinions to differ.  You do not always have to like someone to love them.  Choosing to spend time with people even when they do not agree with you is a sign of maturity and emotional intelligence.  

Each day, remember that you need close and strong relationships to thrive.  Create those strong relationships by using the power of your communication, acceptance of differences, and commitment to follow through.  Life is fuller with family and friends.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.” ― Donald Miller

“There is greatness in doing something you hate for the sake of someone you love.” ― Shmuley Boteach

Spring Abundance

This weekend we celebrated Easter, and the day could not have been more beautiful.  Springtime in Michigan is the time that everything starts to feel better.  The sun shines brighter, and the flowers and trees begin to bloom.  The past year has been challenging, so spring 2021 feels more optimistic than ever.  As we emerge from the pandemic and open up the world, we can appreciate what we have.  Spring is a time to feel grateful and enjoy living an abundant life.

I just have to look around a bit to appreciate all the great things that I have. A stress-filled day at work feels better if I embrace the kind words of a long-time client. When a client treats one of my team members with rudeness — and they often do — I encourage them to acknowledge all of the other clients that were patient and grateful for our services.  Even people that are challenging will push you to grow. If you let it, the contrast of good and bad will help you to feel more grateful for your chosen career. 

When someone is treating you poorly, practice your empathy.  Feeling empathy for someone, rather than joining them in their rude behavior, will allow you to feel more fulfilled.  Empathy is a skill that you can learn and grow stronger with practice. 

Live with a realization that other’s successes or failures are not affecting your success.  There is enough happiness and opportunity to go around, so wishing ill will to others is not productive.  Practicing appreciation for others’ success will ultimately bring you more peace and happiness than jealously ever could. When you see someone with something you want, admire and emulate them rather than envy them.  

As I look back on the changes that we have made since last Easter, I see how I have had to work on myself to stay focused and move forward.  Focusing on abundance and gratitude allows me to realize that I am in charge of my future. To enjoy life, you have to be grateful.  Looking for little blessings makes the everyday challenges seem less severe.  People that achieve success are those that remember to appreciate the good in each day.  They create big dreams and set a positive mindset to push towards those dreams. 

Dr. Julie Cappel 

 “The key to abundance is meeting limited circumstances with unlimited thoughts.” ~ Marianne Williamson

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Foiled by Distraction

I had a hectic week this week, and I was looking forward to a Saturday off where I could catch up on my housework, paperwork, and rest.   I created this long list of housekeeping chores, reading, and writing that I wanted to do and started in on it after my morning coffee. As I cleaned up the basement storage area, only the second task on my list, I ran across some leftover paint that I saved from a previous project.  I was getting ready to get rid of the paint when I had a thought that I could use the paint to update the blinds in my kitchen. They had been neglected since I changed the color of the walls some months ago.  I took down one pane of the blinds to see how the color would work in the room, and as it dried, I had the thought that I could just paint them all and have it done in a couple hours.  Eight hours later, I finished the can of paint on the last pane.  My Saturday to-do list was totally blown out of the water.  Now, I had a kitchen full of wet window blinds and another big mess to clean up tomorrow.  

Why does this happen?  So often, I start with one project in mind and get totally swept away by another.  In my case, it is partially personality-driven — I love variety and the challenge of every new shiny project — and partially procrastination.  The new project is much more appealing than the uncomfortable feelings that mundane tasks present. Procrastination is not laziness; it is just a way to avoid pain. Ironically, once we avoid the painful task, then we feel annoyance at ourselves for avoiding the task.   Somewhere in my mind, painting blinds sounded less painful than cleaning the basement, writing, or recording a podcast.  It is irrational, but this is how our human brain works.  (Avoid pain, seek pleasure)

When we feel any negative emotion i.e., boredom, insecurity, frustration, or anxiety, we commonly will find a way to avoid those feelings by doing something else.   We eat a snack, drink something, watch movies, or even do other work in an effort to avoid those feelings.  Procrastination is not a time management problem; it is a “thinking” problem.  Suppose we have low opinions of ourselves or thoughts about an unpleasant task. In that case, we will often find something else to do that we think will feel better.  The problem with letting this become habitual is that the avoidance of the important yet negative task reinforces negative emotion about ourselves and our lack of self discipline.   The procrastination that we practice inadvertently creates more procrastination and negative feelings.  

How can we do better?  Working to understand the root of procrastination will help us start to solve for it.  Practicing forgiveness when we do avoid a certain task and allowing ourselves grace is another way to escape the procrastination loop.  Finding small rewards within the scheduled task may help us stop avoiding it.  I find that I avoid housework less if I play music while cleaning.  The music adds something pleasant to the unpleasant cleaning tasks.  Simultaneously removing the temptation of your preferred distraction (hide the snacks) will help you avoid it in the future.  

Just being aware that procrastination is a normal part of our brain’s function will help you see through yourself when it happens.  Forgive yourself and try again to complete the task that you have so cleverly avoided.  In my case, that would be finishing my basement cleaning before I take on another project. If I know myself, there will be at least one basement discovery that leads to another long distraction.  Wish me luck tomorrow!

Dr. Julie Cappel

“In a moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing to do, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”  – Theodore Roosevelt

Spring Forward

This week it really started to feel like spring in Michigan.  Daylight savings time kicked in last weekend and we had some rather warm sunny days all week.   I am not stupid enough to believe that we will have no more freezing weather, but just the fact that the days are getting longer and I was able to take my dogs for a walk without a hat and gloves was enough to make me feel optimistic about summer coming.  

Spring seems to be the happiest, most optimistic season especially if you live in the northern United States.  The days are transformed from  cold into warm and from darkness into light.  Spring is when we see flowers bloom and grass turn green. Spring is the time we usually get stray kittens brought into work too, and who among us can resist the cuteness of a kitten? (I can’t wait!)

Spring is a perfect time to commit to change. The changes that we resolve to make seem easier when the weather is improving and the world is blooming.  I enjoy coaching people as they commit to making positive change.  It is such a fun process!  Each time we take a step towards personal growth and self improvement we allow ourselves to progress towards greater happiness.  It is a choice that we make to move ahead instead of standing still — risking failure in an attempt to learn from our mistakes and grow.

Take some time now to think about the changes that you wish to make in your life.  Even if they have failed in the past, you can commit to trying again. Create a strong vision of the changes that you want to see and then plan some small steps to get started in that direction.  Flowers emerge slowly from the ground in spring, so do not be in a hurry to see the full bloom of your goal without taking some time to grow your plan. 

Plan for some obstacles along the way.  Even in April we can get a little snow.  As you are working towards any goal you will encounter a set back or two.  Expect it and plan for it.  Planning solutions to possible obstacles ahead of time will help you to cope with frustration.  Quitting is not an option, but work arounds are critical.  Successful people are those that push on when things get difficult.  Having a plan for your obstacles will help you avoid feeling discouraged if the plan does not unfold exactly as you envisioned.

As you enjoy the longer days and prettier weather, think about the things that you want to change in your life this year.  Use the optimism of spring to allow you to create positive change.  Work with a coach or mentor if needed to keep you on track, then get moving. Open yourself up to the possibility thinking that comes with spring.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant; if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome.”— Anne Bradstreet