My old friend self-doubt!

 This week I had a significant and unexpected visit from my old friend self-doubt. I say unexpected, because I thought that my mind was in a good place. 

I spent last week at the most amazing retreat!  I was at the Sundance Resort in Salt Lake City attending what can best be described as a self-reflection and leadership retreat.    I stayed in a luxurious cabin nestled in the Utah mountains and spent three days just working on my mind and gaining new insight into leadership and self-reliance.   I learned some new leadership concepts and also gained some interesting tools that I can use to help myself and others. 

When I got back to “real-life” on Monday, I thought I would be free of the old patterns of self-doubt -- but NO!  Self-doubt strikes again.

I have been pushing myself out of my comfort zone lately by taking a class, learning a new computer program at work, writing a presentation, and working on my podcast – all things that are new to me and bring up that old “self-doubt” voice in my head.  These were all telling me that I am not good enough, smart enough, or talented enough to achieve the things that I want to achieve.  Why?  Why is that voice always there?

I would have thought that after the retreat that I attended that my brain would be in the perfect place to contend with self-doubt, and I would argue that it probably is, but that does not stop my brain from taking me down that road again and trying to hold me down.

Self-doubt is our brains’ way of holding us back and keeping us from seizing new opportunities.

Remember that your brain was wired to protect you from harm.  It wants you to stay in the cave and stay small so you will be protected.  “Don’t take chances.”  “Don’t step out of the crowd.” Your brain persistently to tell you, “You may fail or get hurt.”  

The opposite is really true.  You can’t be a fully developed person without overcoming your self-doubt.  You will always feel its tug to stay safe, but you need to kick it in the knees and get it out of your way to become the badass person that you want to become.

How can we fight back against self-doubt when our brain brings it up? 

Tell your brain to stop!  Hold up that imaginary stop sign in your head and push back the negative thoughts as soon as they arise.   The thoughts in your head are under your control.  You can say, “stop” to your negative thoughts then consciously decide to choose better, more encouraging thoughts.

Don’t compare yourself to others. Compare yourself to yourself only!    When you work to become one baby step better than the person you were yesterday you can let go of the comparison game.  Most of the people you compare yourself to are just as broken and human as you feel. Comparing your inside to the outside of someone else is just not realistic.   Let go of comparisons and concentrate on making yourself the best version of yourself that you can be.

Keeping a success journal is a great exercise to help you keep your past success in front of your face and mind. If you can easily see and remember that when you were able to overcome adversity and become successful before, it will help you pull out of the negativity loop.   Reading about your successes will help you to become clear about which issues are really worth your concern and which things are just a blip on the radar of your life.  And even if you do fail, you know how to handle it.  Fill your mind with positive images and let go of the negative. 

Other people are not focused on you.  We have a tendency to think that everyone is watching and judging us, but that is simply not true.  Most people don’t care what you do or say.  Most people are wrapped up in their own problems and situations.  They are worried about their family, jobs, pets, and finances.  As long as you are doing the best veterinary job for them, they will feel loved and cared for by you and your team.  That is all that most people want.

If you have a setback, realize that it is temporary.  If you live your life to the fullest you will indeed have setbacks and failures.  It is all part of the progression deal.  Don’t fear the small failures but see them as steps that you are taking to become the best human being that you can be.  Realize that there are lessons for you in every failure and if you choose to embrace the lessons, you can continue to move forward into your best life.

Dr. Julie Cappel

 “Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt.”
― William Shakespeare

“Believe in your infinite potential. Your only limitations are those you set upon yourself.
Believe in yourself, your abilities and your own potential. Never let self-doubt hold you captive. You are worthy of all that you dream of and hope for.”
― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart



Join me on the Podcast - The Veterinary Life Coach Podcast with Dr. Julie Cappel 

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-veterinary-life-coach-podcast-with-dr-julie-cappel/id1451549730?mt=2