Christmas Blessings

I am writing this on Christmas Day from my living room couch. I am grateful for all of my many blessings. I am healthy, my husband is healthy, my parents are healthy, my adult children are visiting from Los Angeles and Dallas, and they are in the kitchen preparing a Christmas Feast. As they work, the holiday music is playing, and they are all singing and laughing. The dogs, there are three and another one joining us later, are running around begging for treats. The noise and chaotic atmosphere are a treat after experiencing an empty nest for the past year. Those of you with small children do not understand missing noise, but once your kids are grown, you will have time to miss the laughter and even crying and arguments.

We have been through seasons of joy and loss, so I know that not every holiday is joyful. After two years of dealing with the pandemic, I know we all want to feel freedom and happiness again. If you are struggling to find something to be grateful for this year, here are some ways to stay positive and care for yourself and your feelings.

Spend some time looking for the year’s blessings. Even when things are not going well, we can work to find some small things to be thankful for. They may be very small things like a good night’s sleep, coffee in the morning, a sunny day, or even just a roof over your head. By searching for the good things, you can shift your focus away from your challenges. 

Call a friend. Reaching out to check on someone else will help you feel better when you feel down. Talking to another human about your problems or theirs will give you a feeling of community, knowing that you are not alone. Your friend may be suffering too, and just the act of you reaching out may bring them out of their negativity. Challenge each other to remember positive experiences and share good memories. Those memories may help get you both more joy.

If you are not having a healthy holiday season this year, I understand you are not feeling blessed. That is OK. We can feel the sadness or loss and know there will be better days ahead if we hang on. As 2023 approaches, try to look back on your blessings in 2022. Even if your year was challenging or your loss was devastating, you can resolve to remember the happy memories. Remember that life is a series of ups and downs; much of the joy is in the lessons we learn about ourselves through the challenges. Have a beautiful holiday season and New Year.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.” – Charles Dickens