Routines Bring Returns

Do you ever wonder where your time goes? Why does it seem that our work days go so slowly and our home days go by so fast?

It could be because we have our work days carefully scheduled, and our days off are so loosely planned. We have "day off" giant to-do lists, but we do not take time to plan and schedule our tasks. 

You must examine where you are now to achieve more, accomplish more, and work towards personal growth. Are you using your time wisely? Do you have a dialed-in routine to help you achieve your goals? What are you doing to change?

Personal growth and change involve working on yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally. Most of us have some idea of what we want, but we must do the work to follow through. We need to work to change our daily habits and mindset to grow and change direction. Minor changes to your daily habits and routines will go a long way to producing change and bringing significant returns on your investment.

Check with yourself to identify what you want. Becoming mindful of what you are doing now will allow you to decide if you want to change. What is your mindset? Are you thinking optimistically about your day, or are you allowing the day's events to control you? The only control that you have over your day is to control yourself. 

So now that you know you want to change, what can you do to grow and accomplish more?

Establish a solid morning routine. Most successful people get up early and have a routine to start their day right. Begin your day calmly and avoid rushing. Make your bed, eat breakfast, and do some meditation or yoga to ease into your day. Take a few minutes to plan your tasks early in the morning, and give yourself time to think about how you want to approach the day ahead. Remember that working on your mindset for a few moments will do great things for your ability to handle stress.

Make your to-do list, prioritize it, and time block it. Take a few moments in your morning routine or if you are like me and plan better in the evening, do it the night before. Prioritizing will help you sort out the urgent and important things and let go of the not-so-important stuff. Remember to schedule your self-care tasks as a priority. It may be as simple as taking a moment to offer yourself encouragement and love. Caring for the caregiver is always top of the list. 

When I say time-blocking, I mean assigning a time to do the tasks and setting a timer for each task. In addition, schedule twenty minutes to clean or reorganize something you have put off. The organization feels better than a mess, so get motivated by organizing your workspace or home. We often avoid cleaning because it is no fun, right? But, if you do a small amount each day, it will become manageable. 

If you want to get more out of your life, manage your stress by planning for growth and change. Stress magnifies when you avoid your life, but peace comes from managing yourself and your time. Improve your routine to get bigger results. 

Dr. Julie Cappel

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"The secret of your future is hidden in your daily routine." - Mike Murdock.

New Year? So what now?

I have been working on writing this blog for the past two weeks, which is unusual for me as I often write my blogs in one day. I have been struggling with this because I have produced several blogs and podcasts about New Year's resolutions, goal setting, change, and how to start afresh in the new year. This time, I wondered what else I could offer to help you create your best new year? 

Here is what I came up with. 

I want to offer you the thought that every day can be a new start in your life. You do not have to wait till the new year to start anew. We all want to change something, our bad habits, physical or mental health, or we desire to do or learn something new. We do not need to wait until the new year to bring about change. It feels reasonable to choose January first, Monday morning, next week, or someday. 

That restrictive thinking keeps us stuck in our bad habits and "normal" life, and what we really want is an extraordinary life. Waiting till the time is right to start working on yourself will get you to the same place you are now, stuck. If you are anything like me, the "I will start tomorrow" thinking keeps me overeating, not exercising, and procrastinating my self-development because "starting tomorrow" does not work. If we do begin to work on a resolution, as soon as we experience a minor failure, we quit and never achieve it or vow to start again on Monday. 

So, it is January fifteenth, and we are two weeks into 2023. What resolutions are you keeping, and which have failed? If you have already quit those New Year's Resolutions, I encourage you to start again. NOW! Keep starting over and working towards what you want until you get it. Do not wait for tomorrow, next week, Monday, or 2024. Start again and work now.

The only way to overcome procrastination is to stop feeling anxious, overwhelmed, or stuck. Getting our brains to see the possibility of change is the work that needs to be done to persevere. If you find that you are doing everything but working on your goals, you are an average human; congratulations. We all procrastinate and struggle to achieve our goals, but here are a few ways you can work to get over that and restart for the new year. 

Start by understanding your motivation for your New Year's Resolution in the first place. Why do you want what you want? What pain are you experiencing by not getting it? Most of the emotional pain you are experiencing is shame and self-judgment when you do not take action. Once you understand yourself better, you will be on to yourself and your excuses. Know where you are currently and where you want to go. 

Next, list the steps required to get back on track with your resolution. What have you avoided and why? Do not list anything that does not involve your resolution. Having the daily, mundane tasks on your list will give you an excuse to avoid your resolution goal. Then, break it down into baby steps that feel easier. If it is a food goal, plan one meal at a time, not a whole week. If it is an exercise goal, take it one day at a time. Do one simple task and get moving forward.

The most important step is changing your self-talk. Thinking that this is too difficult or impossible will not serve you. Change your thinking with strong and capable statements about yourself. You will feel less overwhelmed if you decide that you can do it. You will build momentum towards your goal if you achieve one step at a time.  

Remember that when you avoid change, you are ultimately creating more pain for yourself in the future. If you accept a slight change and a little pain now, you will be so much happier later as you achieve your dreams.

It is January 15, and you stopped working on your New Year's Resolution. So what? Begin again right now. Take one baby step, and continue until you have whatever you want.

Call me if you need help.

Dr. Julie Cappel

Christmas Blessings

I am writing this on Christmas Day from my living room couch. I am grateful for all of my many blessings. I am healthy, my husband is healthy, my parents are healthy, my adult children are visiting from Los Angeles and Dallas, and they are in the kitchen preparing a Christmas Feast. As they work, the holiday music is playing, and they are all singing and laughing. The dogs, there are three and another one joining us later, are running around begging for treats. The noise and chaotic atmosphere are a treat after experiencing an empty nest for the past year. Those of you with small children do not understand missing noise, but once your kids are grown, you will have time to miss the laughter and even crying and arguments.

We have been through seasons of joy and loss, so I know that not every holiday is joyful. After two years of dealing with the pandemic, I know we all want to feel freedom and happiness again. If you are struggling to find something to be grateful for this year, here are some ways to stay positive and care for yourself and your feelings.

Spend some time looking for the year’s blessings. Even when things are not going well, we can work to find some small things to be thankful for. They may be very small things like a good night’s sleep, coffee in the morning, a sunny day, or even just a roof over your head. By searching for the good things, you can shift your focus away from your challenges. 

Call a friend. Reaching out to check on someone else will help you feel better when you feel down. Talking to another human about your problems or theirs will give you a feeling of community, knowing that you are not alone. Your friend may be suffering too, and just the act of you reaching out may bring them out of their negativity. Challenge each other to remember positive experiences and share good memories. Those memories may help get you both more joy.

If you are not having a healthy holiday season this year, I understand you are not feeling blessed. That is OK. We can feel the sadness or loss and know there will be better days ahead if we hang on. As 2023 approaches, try to look back on your blessings in 2022. Even if your year was challenging or your loss was devastating, you can resolve to remember the happy memories. Remember that life is a series of ups and downs; much of the joy is in the lessons we learn about ourselves through the challenges. Have a beautiful holiday season and New Year.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.” – Charles Dickens