We all have many things that we want to get done. There are short-term and long-term life goals, and then there are the things that you have to get done in order to get a paycheck or keep yourself and your family clothed and fed. We know the, “have to” things are usually the priority so by the end of the day when we only have half of them done, we become stressed, frustrated, and overwhelmed. Also, just so tired.
I have been struggling for the past few weeks with getting things done. My weekly blog, my podcast, my job, my housework, and even my eating and exercise are taking a back seat to my confusion. My mind is all over the place with ideas of the things that I would like to get done but there are so many things that need doing. What to do next? When I think about it, I become overwhelmed with all the possibilities. I indulge in the emotion of confusion, causing my brain to shut down and want to grab a snack and watch something really mindless on Netflix.
How do we get out from under the indulgent emotion of confusion in order to take steps towards accomplishing a goal?
First practice some self-compassion. Stop beating yourself up over what you did not get done today. When you berate yourself you just create more excuses and allow your brain to believe that you are no good at accomplishing tasks and attaining goals. This will add to your confusion.
Let go of the thought, “I don’t know”. Thinking that you don’t know how to do something feels valid but when you think it your brain automatically shuts down. If your brain shuts down, you are not able to take a step to choose something to do. When you think that you don’t know, ask yourself one question. What would I do if I did know? Answer that question and you can start on a plan.
In order to get started and create momentum, choose just one thing to focus on and complete each day. If you start with one small thing and do it consistently it will begin to become a habit. You can start small. Ten minutes of reading, exercise or meditation each day consistently will turn into something that you commit to. Once you have developed a new habit you can expand into another task or take the next step towards your goal.
When you feel yourself falling into the trap of self-indulgent confusion, understand where that emotion is coming from. Hold space to feel self-compassion and then force yourself to choose a first step towards your goal. Even if that first step is not obvious take an action anyway. With each action you will learn what works and what fails. If you choose one step at a time, commit to an action consistently, and follow up with a second action, you will eventually reach any goal.
Now, I need to go get something done.
Dr. Julie Cappel
“What is not started today is never finished tomorrow.”
– Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
– Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
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