Seek First to Understand

It occurred to me yesterday, as I was telling my family a very funny story from my workday that being a good listener is a huge part of my job.  Veterinarians must be good listeners and very often, good actors too. Some of the stories we are told are not to be believed and would cause a normal person to either laugh hysterically or drop open their jaw in disbelief. 

Listening is one of the most important skills that we as veterinarians must perfect, and is one of Stephen Covey’s seven habits from the book “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”.  Steven said, “Most people do not listen to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” 

John Maxwell, leadership guru, calls listening our most important skill.  He recommends that we spend 80% of our time listening and 20% talking.

In veterinary medicine we not only have to listen to the clients to get an idea about why their pet needs help.  We also spend much of our time “listening” to the body language of our patients as we attempt to figure out what they are telling us about their illnesses.

There are multiple ways that we can work to develop skill as a good listener to benefit our clients our teams and ourselves.  These are the some proven steps for success when it comes to listening carefully and responding appropriately:

Identify the speaker’s problem.  You can get to the identification of the problem by asking yourself a few questions.  What is the issue that brings this person to me?  What is their goal?  Once you have the answer to these questions you can start to try to understand the facts that will help you solve the problem and offer the speaker a solution that they are after.

Determine the person's mindset and formulate your plan to cater to them.  Are they approaching from a scarcity mindset or an abundant mindset?   Are they more concerned about the financial cost for treatments, or are they willing to align your goals with theirs in order to get to the bottom of the problem?

Respond in a way that meets the other persons wants and needs.  To respond in the correct way you need to approach the problem with empathy and the speaker’s personality in mind. Use the words that you believe that the speaker wants to hear as you present the solution to their problem.  If you have really paid attention and listened well you will have no problem getting their problem solved to everyone's satisfaction. 

Remember that listening is a skill that requires practice and the ability to be generous to the other persons' needs and wants.  If you listen with the goal to understand as your first priority  it will open up your skill as a listener and grow your relationship with your clients and your team.

And also practice your "straight face" for those times when the clients say or do things that cause a shocked response.  Then later you can use those stories to entertain your family and friends.  

Dr. Cappel