Sunday, December 22, 2019

Outrageous Generosity




The holidays are the perfect time think about the concept of generosity.  I have always thought that giving things to others is way more fun than receiving things.  For me, that has always been true, but what exactly does it mean to be generous, and what does it really do for us?

According to Psychology Today, “Generosity is the act of being kind, selfless, and giving to others. Despite being an act that is done to benefit others' well-being, generosity also paradoxically increases our well-being. So being generous is a fantastic way to improve your mental health and well-being.”

This week I learned that my mom committed an act of outrageous generosity.  My parents spend their winter months in Florida.  This year my mother discovered a school in the area that was in dire need of school supplies.  The school is in a struggling area of Florida where the families do the best they can for the students, but there are things that they just cannot afford.  My mom stays in a community nearby, so she sees the school and the children when she drives back and forth on her way to the store. 

My mother is a very generous person, but she is not the type that likes to be the center of attention.  It turns out that she had been thinking about donating to this school for weeks and didn’t follow through.  When my sister Jill arrived to visit, my mother shared the idea with her.  My sister and I are much less attention adverse, so Jill jumped right on the idea and encouraged my mother to go shopping to buy the school supplies.  They went to The Dollar Tree and Walmart and bought hundreds of dollars’ worth of crayons, pencils, paper, glue, scissors, paper towel, hand sanitizer, and desk wipes.   Mom then called the school and asked if they could drop off the supplies to the principal. The principal was most surprised at the volume of things that my mother and sister brought to the school.  They had never seen such generosity from a stranger randomly donating to their little school. The principal wrote a beautiful note thanking my mother for her outrageous generosity.

Who gets the most out of this encounter?  My mom and sister who carried out the donation.   When you give, it goes a long way into improving your own mental health. Giving brings you feelings of accomplishment, lowers stress and brings joy to your life. Generosity also has a ripple effect.  When someone else sees you doing something generous, it makes them more likely to do something generous too; therefore, this increases everyone’s wellbeing.

How can we learn to be outrageously generous?

It is a natural part of most people’s makeup to be generous and kind; however, we can override our generosity gene by thinking too much. The thinking part of our brain can create a fear that by giving, we may not have enough; yet, the opposite is true.  Working to overcome our scarcity mindset is the first step in becoming a more generous person and thus happier.

Developing positive thinking skills such as gratitude will help us to become more generous. The happier and more blessed we feel, the more likely we are to give to others.  If you are open to becoming more generous, you will improve your own feelings of self-worth, joy and happiness.

Think about being outrageously generous this holiday season.  Focus on giving in ways to make a positive impact on someone else’s life.  The more you give of yourself, the better you will feel.

Dr. Julie Cappel

“For it is in giving that we receive.”
― St. Francis of Assisi

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